A date with Money

My money profile

Five years ago, I read a book by Joe Vitale - though I can't recall its title - It was about our "money profile." This profile reflects our financial programming based on how we saw our parents and others deal with money. The homework was eye-opening: write down everything we've said about money and observed during childhood.

I documented the stress my parents faced, the lack we kids experienced, and the divorce that followed. I wrote statements that, looking back, clearly shaped my future money experiences: "Money causes stress," "Money is hard to come by," "Money is for the greedy and the root of all evil."

This exercise also gave me new insight into my dad's struggles as he provided for his wife and six kids. Despite our issues and my running away at 16, I now understood the immense pressure he was under. Still, I was left with a troubling "definition" of money: that you must work incredibly hard for little reward, ending up stressed, isolated from family, and perpetually broke.

Both my sister and I shared this money profile, and we experienced similar financial outcomes. Our younger brothers, however, had different experiences. They weren't exposed to the abuse my sister and I faced when our parents were stressed about money.

It was typically during times of financial strain that our parents' stress manifested as mistreatment towards us two older siblings. This pattern of behavior, absent in our younger brothers' upbringing, likely contributed to the differences in our financial trajectories.

This realization highlighted how deeply our childhood experiences with money shaped our adult financial lives, and how varying exposure to financial stress within the same family could lead to drastically different outcomes.

More revelation

As I reflected further, I realized my observations extended beyond my father's stress. I noticed how my mom's work schedule - nights at work, days spent sleeping - prevented her from fully engaging in our lives. Now, with adult perspective, my heart aches for the sacrifices she made.

Nonetheless, this situation further reinforced our developing definition of money: a source of stress and a force that tears families apart. Both parents, in their struggle to provide, inadvertently contributed to a narrative where financial pursuits seemed to come at the cost of family bonds and personal well-being.

This complex interplay of parental sacrifice, financial stress, and family dynamics deepened my understanding of how our childhood experiences shape our long-term relationship with money.

After this eye-opening exercise and revelation, Joe Vitale proposed an intriguing task in his book: to go on an imaginary date with money. He asked us to visualize money as if it were a person sitting across from us at a dinner table.

The challenge was to explore our feelings and perceptions in this imaginary encounter. What does money look like when personified? How do we feel in its presence? What emotions arise when we sit face-to-face with money?

This creative exercise aimed to bring our subconscious attitudes about money to the surface, encouraging us to confront and potentially reshape our relationship with it. It was a unique approach to understanding our deep-seated beliefs about wealth and finances.

My first date with money

When I embarked on this imaginative exercise, the experience was incredibly vivid and real, thanks to my daily manifestation practices. As I sat down for my dinner date with money, I was struck by its overwhelming presence.

Money appeared as a colossal male figure, ten times my size and incredibly muscular. The resemblance to my perception of my father was uncanny - intimidating and overpowering. This representation immediately put me on edge, nearly causing me to shut down emotionally.

The figure was so enormous that it couldn't even fit at the dinner table. This vivid imagery powerfully illustrated my subconscious view of money: an intimidating force that I felt small and powerless against.

This exercise revealed how deeply my childhood experiences had shaped my relationship with money, manifesting as a figure that inspired fear rather than comfort or opportunity.

This imaginative exercise led to a profound revelation for me. As I engaged with the personification of money, I found myself seeking reconciliation.

I began to apologize to money, asking forgiveness for the negative beliefs I had held about its character. These beliefs, I realized, were rooted in generational misconceptions and my limited childhood observations.

With each request for forgiveness, a remarkable transformation occurred. The intimidating figure of money began to shrink, gradually becoming smaller until it could comfortably fit at the table with me. This visual change mirrored my shifting perspective on wealth and finances.

This powerful experience made me acutely aware of how intimidated I had been by money. I recognized the need to cultivate a new, more positive image of money if we were to have a productive relationship. This exercise marked the beginning of a significant shift in my approach to finances and abundance.

Abby

In response to my newfound awareness of my issues with male authority figures, stemming from my relationship with my father, I decided to reimagine money as a woman. I sought to create an image of maturity, care, and partnership.

As I focused my imagination, a vivid image emerged: an older, well-groomed woman wearing a white dress adorned with abundant jewelry. Her demeanor was a fascinating mix of arrogance and loving care. This representation felt both powerful and approachable, a stark contrast to my previous intimidating male figure.

Curious about her identity, I asked for her name. "Abby," she replied, "short for Abundance." This name perfectly encapsulated what I hoped my new relationship with money would embody - not scarcity or stress, but true abundance.

This reimagining marked a significant shift in my approach to wealth and finances. By personifying money as Abby, I created a more positive, nurturing association with abundance, paving the way for a healthier financial mindset.

My business partner

To this day, I maintain a daily dialogue with Abby, treating her as a privileged partner in my life's work. This perspective shift has been transformative - I now see money as a tool that works for and with me, rather than an intimidating force to submit to.

I no longer cower in the presence of money or adhere to the limiting definitions inherited from my parents. Instead, Abby represents a trusted ally who has my best interests at heart. She's a partner I can rely on, not an adversary to fear.

This new perspective on money has become a guiding principle in my life. I understand that as long as I maintain this positive view of abundance, my experiences will align with this definition. My relationship with Abby continues to shape my financial reality, creating opportunities and abundance in ways my younger self could never have imagined.

My major change with money

Through daily journaling, I record both small victories and significant deals, celebrating every win that Abby and I create together. This practice allows me to witness the tangible results of my "Major Change" in mindset.

The impact of this transformation has been so profound that I've established a millionaire mindset group, which includes an actual billionaire and millionaire among its members. In these meetings, we collaborate to refine our perspectives on money and wealth. The regular gatherings serve as a powerful accountability mechanism, ensuring we maintain and build upon our positive financial mindsets.

This group has become a testament to the power of changing one's relationship with money. It's a space where we continue to challenge and evolve our understanding of abundance, supporting each other in our journeys toward greater financial success and personal fulfillment.

When I founded this group, my vision was to create a platform that serves multiple purposes. For those aspiring to become millionaires, it offers invaluable insights from individuals who have already achieved significant financial success. These accomplished members can share their experiences, strategies, and mindset shifts that contributed to their wealth.

Simultaneously, the group provides an opportunity for financially successful individuals to give back. They can mentor and guide others who are at earlier stages of their financial journeys - positions they once occupied themselves. This dynamic creates a cycle of learning, growth, and mentorship that benefits all members, regardless of their current financial status.

The ultimate goal is to foster an environment of shared wisdom, mutual support, and continuous personal development, all centered around cultivating a millionaire mindset and achieving financial abundance.